“As we were celebrating our new hope, someone else was mourning their loss.” Abby Gray
A “bittersweet” time, as Abby Gray explains, for she and her husband Reid when they were first told that a liver donor was found who could provide the organ transplant desperately needed by Reid. The donor, Clayton Sparks, twenty-four-year-old son of Beth and Larry Sparks of Willis, Texas, had just experienced a devastating ski accident in Colorado and was a possible liver match for Reid who had been waiting for just under two anxious, yet hopeful, years for this news. Sometimes…many times…good things come at a price.
Born and raised in Huntsville, Abby married Reid in 2014, and as they were enjoying their first wedded months together, now residents of Cypress, Texas, he became increasingly ill with symptoms that defied explanation. After a series of tests, it became clear Reid was suffering from Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, a disease affecting the liver. Since there was no cure for the disease other than having a liver transplant, the wait was on.
In the meantime, the couple, ready to start a family, suffered three miscarriages and had begun the process of in vitro fertilization. During these four years of miscarriages and in vitro cycles, Abby and Reid traveled all over the United States to register him at different transplant centers. As she relates, “Our support system of family and friends gave us strength and hope,” a statement fully endorsed by Reid. Their motto became, “Expect Miracles,” and the sale of shirts sporting these hope-filled words were sold to pay for expenses. Abby became an avid blogger as she related the ups and downs of the journey to her Facebook audience. “I kept saying that I don’t know how this will turn out, but it will be amazing,” and she adds, “I always expected him to be here so we could raise a family together, but it would take some miracles for this to happen. I was thirty-one and did not want to lose him or to be a childless widow.” She and family members routinely perused the internet for possible donor situations.
In January 2019, the much-anticipated call came. Reid had been on the transplant list for just under two years, and Abby was in her twenty-first week of pregnancy. They were told to pack their bags. If everything worked out and all the tests were positive for a successful transplant, it would take place the following day. Their transplant team flew to Colorado that evening to retrieve the organ, and a successful operation was performed in Houston the following day. As Reid expresses, “I’m incredibly grateful to everyone–to Clayton, his family, our support system–and to Abby. I didn’t realize I was as sick as I was. The situation became urgent before I realized the severity of it. I appreciate all the things people did for us before, during, and after.”
To commemorate the life and gift of Clayton Sparks, Abby has just published a book entitled, “CLAYTON SPARKS Leaves His Mark.” It was released on April 19, “World Liver Day.” Clayton was an exceptionally warm-hearted individual, and stories in the book relate several real-life examples of his kindness. It is written in an easy-to-understand style and filled with charming illustrations by Abby’s mother, Dee Everett. The original proof of the book was presented this past Christmas to Clayton’s parents, Beth and Larry. Abby gave birth to twins, Oliver and Kaylee, in April 2019, three months after the transplant. To honor the memory of Clayton, Reid and Abby–with the blessings of Beth and Larry–gave Oliver the middle name of Clayton. A strong and endearing bond has been formed between the families. The Sparks are treated as grandparents to the twins, and the children spend countless hours playing at their house. It’s a warm relationship, and Clayton would approve.
Clayton loved people. As a young boy, his family would visit a loved one at Bridgewood Farms, a daycare program for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities. At age seven, Clayton went into his parent’s room one night at bedtime and shared his concern that some of the individuals at Bridgewood Farms would not receive Christmas gifts. He wanted to buy gifts for everyone. His mother encouraged him to go to bed and they would come up with a solution later. His parents were surprised in the morning to find that Clayton had stayed up all night long writing notes to his friends asking them to bring gifts to school for this charitable cause. When Christmas arrived, Clayton dressed up as Santa Claus and lovingly distributed the gifts. Clayton continued to express this same kind of love and care for others throughout his brief life. He used to encourage his friends to share by saying, “You can’t take it with you when you’re gone.” Through the kindness of his parents, Clayton’s life has continued to bless others. “CLAYTON SPARKS Leaves His Mark” shares more about Clayton’s life and includes activities for children, teens, and families to develop empathy and discover ways to reach out and give to others. Again, Clayton would approve.
Abby now volunteers with LifeGift, a non-profit organization that supports organ donors and recipients. She also serves on the Board of Children’s Transplant Initiative. She has plans for a future book to document the entire journey that she and Reid traveled from diagnosis to transplant, and feels this will give encouragement to others as well as supply information on all aspects of the process. It will also acknowledge to friends and family their significant role in providing support to those in stress-filled situations.
• To donate to the Clayton Sparks Memorial Foundation, visit https://www.facebook.com/Clayton SparksMemorialFoundation
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